when he was younger he was involved in the school athletics's program, physically fit but to shy to excel at any one particular sport but since his days at school were far behind him he had let himself physically go his six pack abs had become twelve pack possibly a case or on certain days a keg abs, also his boyish good looks had gone straight to hell.( in his own mind),when he was younger he could have been a model, now when he said he needed his beauty sleep he certainly meant it. he began looking like the majority of people in the fast food line of your local burger joint and speaking of joints there was hardly a time in the past several years that there wasn't a cigarette or marijuana joint dangling from his powty lips. he found that when his reality was altered by smoking whacky-tobaccy he had an imaginary strength giving him some sort of super-human capabilities that straight he wouldn't think of attempting. also when he had on a good buzz it made him just a little less shy making it just a little easier picking up women(although those women were required to be seeing impaired without morals if possible)..
one particular saturday night he and a friend were just setting around smoking and drinking and being thoroughly obnoxious when they decided he should take it upon himself to punish the ones that had made his life just a little more stressful than it needed to be. they also decided,"possibly due to their altered frame of mind" that a name was called for and some sort of outfit or costume. at the time they couldn't think of a good name but it just so happened there were some old Halloween costume's and accessories in a nearby closet so he began trying things on, he and his friend decided that for his costume a richard nixon mask, antennas(from the year he dressed like an alien), and a tight black leotard body suit that left very little to the imagination it accentuated his beer gut and manhood.
they came to the conclusion that he would be a cross between robin hood,burl ives(who did the narration in the movie rudolph the red nose reindeer), and the Pillsbury doh boy.his friend thought he looked fairly repulsive and thoroughly ridiculous in his outfit but he knew that with the right amount of alcohol in his bloodstream his appearance wouldn't matter, at least to him.he also thought that all super-hero's needed a name so he put a duct tape "U" on his chest and christianed him urin-nator was born(champion to all).
eventually he made it to the car and was on his way to righting societies injustices when the small town's only policeman pulled him over and arrested him for D.U.I.(driving under the influence). so he spent his first evening as a super-hero at the county jail.
when he finally woke the following day his dreams of being a super-hero seemed to have vanished so he threw his outfit away keeping only the "Richard Nixon" mask and wearing it on special occasions and saying "I am not a crook" sounding similar to richard nixon himself.
one particular saturday night he and a friend were just setting around smoking and drinking and being thoroughly obnoxious when they decided he should take it upon himself to punish the ones that had made his life just a little more stressful than it needed to be. they also decided,"possibly due to their altered frame of mind" that a name was called for and some sort of outfit or costume. at the time they couldn't think of a good name but it just so happened there were some old Halloween costume's and accessories in a nearby closet so he began trying things on, he and his friend decided that for his costume a richard nixon mask, antennas(from the year he dressed like an alien), and a tight black leotard body suit that left very little to the imagination it accentuated his beer gut and manhood.
they came to the conclusion that he would be a cross between robin hood,burl ives(who did the narration in the movie rudolph the red nose reindeer), and the Pillsbury doh boy.his friend thought he looked fairly repulsive and thoroughly ridiculous in his outfit but he knew that with the right amount of alcohol in his bloodstream his appearance wouldn't matter, at least to him.he also thought that all super-hero's needed a name so he put a duct tape "U" on his chest and christianed him urin-nator was born(champion to all).
eventually he made it to the car and was on his way to righting societies injustices when the small town's only policeman pulled him over and arrested him for D.U.I.(driving under the influence). so he spent his first evening as a super-hero at the county jail.
when he finally woke the following day his dreams of being a super-hero seemed to have vanished so he threw his outfit away keeping only the "Richard Nixon" mask and wearing it on special occasions and saying "I am not a crook" sounding similar to richard nixon himself.
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